Musing on 2020

My 2020 Mood Be Like...

Despite losing my aunt (another mother to me, basically) last year, I'm optimistic and in an okay place entering 2020.  Therefore, needless to say, 2019 was heartbreaking and incredibly hard to make sense of.  I'm learning how time, doing your inner work, and focusing on your goals helps with the healing process.  But, most importantly as well, being strong enough to get real help when needed.  Either way, I don't believe there's a such thing as "healing" after a family member's death.  That's something you'll carry forever.  Every.  Day.

While 2019 was tough, I had many personal rewards and soaring highs come my way via my platform/interactions.  Many of those highs I didn't expect.  Like the time someone hacked into my domain account to try to steal it from under me.  Nice try, though.  I shelled out that $90 (no problem, boo) and now comictowel belongs to me until I renew again in 2023.  I've created/owned it since July of 2013, and it'll remain so, honeybun.

you tried it.  you failed it.

Seriously, I don't play about certain things, because I look over everything.  You feel me?  It takes a lot to move me, but babyyyy best believe eventually I'll give you what you want.  But try to control me, take something from me, or get in my way is asking for immediate problems.  And this hacker tried two out of the three only to fail.  Anyway, I digress.  The point is that having the threat of losing my domain empowered me to lock it down and keep pushing harder.  Someone expressed to me how having a hacker try to take my domain is actually a compliment.  Didn't think about it that way, but she made a nice point.

So I guess Life has a funny way of surprising you, as well as you have a funny way of surprising yourself.  Nevertheless, another incredible high comes from all the messages I've received from viewers all over.  Many of those messages from people who found joy, encouragement and inspiration in my posts and videos.  Many of those messages from people encouraging and inspiring me just the same.  (Thanks again J for the Christmas card!  And shout out to the author Patricia Sergeant for the interview.)  So I don't take this platform for granted.  I'll keep building knowing there are people out there who find something uplifting in my works.  As well as find uplifting people to establish a connection with.  Because Lord knows I need these type of individuals around me.  Whew, chile...

Well, I'm closing this down here.  I've agonized over this post for hours, and now I have to go celebrate New Year's with my tribe.

So in closing...

Continue to lift your head up; smile and breathe.  And to remember that you are somebody, and that that somebody is actually pretty cool despite what anyone has to say to the contrary.  I can't stress that enough: YOU ARE SOMEBODY!  Empower yourself in whichever positive way you feel.

Like Alicia Keys says: "I'll never be perfect, but at least now I'm brave.  Don't be mad, it's just a brand new kind of free.  I just found a brand new kind of me.  It's a brand new time for me."

2020